Back to reality

I have spent the past week at “summer camp for scientists” - at one of the many week-long small scientific meetings that are held every year for a group of like-minded scientists to get together and talk about their research. About 7 years ago, I moved into a different area of research and have made some important contributions to that area. That line of investigation has led me to another area of research in order to understand a larger question in cell biology that is of profound importance for human health and disease. So the major focus of the meeting that I was at was in that other area of research - which is a well-established field that was defined by a hypothesis put forth by a visionary scientist in the 1950’s. This particular area of research is still filling in the details of that 50+ year old hypothesis, which has generally proved correct. For those who know a little bit about science (or would like to google the details), this hypothesis is all about how our cells turn the food that we eat into energy-rich molecules that enable us to perform all those activities that make us alive.

I left very early on Sunday morning. Sent my wife an email that morning. Called when I got to my destination airport and talked to my son briefly and said that I would call him went I got to the meeting. Turns out that I was not able to get a cell phone connection because only one cell phone company services that area. I sent my wife an email on Monday explaining the situation. Didn’t hear back from her. Sent my son an email on Wednesday and got an email back from him late last night, to which I replied this morning.

Meanwhile, checking my phone messages from him, I found that I had three phone messages from him on Monday and Tuesday, with him quite distressed and unhappy. My wife was angry and unhappy - probably at me for being gone and for any number of other things that are wrong with her life - starting with the fact that she has never liked living in the state where we live. His email on Thursday night was more upbeat - talking about how the baseball game that he had on Monday went - a single, a double and two walks, with his team winning by quite a big score. He has another game tonight, which I will miss.

His phone calls are hard for me to take. It is clear that his life is much easier when I am there - for a number of reasons. But a frequent strand of thought running through the back of my head while I was at this meeting was that my life just isn’t working. This was prompted by talking to (mostly listening) to stories of my colleagues - who are successful, with happy, well-adjusted kids, working at institutions that appreciate what they are doing. It is all too easy for me to beginning sinking into the slough of despair. But now, on the way back home, I am not taking that path. I am successful at my vocation, my son is great and our relationship is getting stronger as he gets older. Financially, we are doing ok - not great, but only two years or so from being completely debt and mortgage free. Yes, the relationship with my wife is not working. But quite a few other things are. And I need to keep giving my attention and effort to those things that matter.

May Flowers

Just a collage of flowers from my garden that I cut while my son was cavorting in the pool.

It has been raining a lot over the past month. So much so that several baseball games have been cancelled or postponed till later in June - just in time for the heat and humidity of summer. But my garden is soaking it up. Irises are just about done, as are the peonies. The roses should continue all summer. Daylillies are just about ready to open, along with my favorite - the tiger lily (Lilium columbianum).

Academic honors

My son is graduating from 5th grade next week. Off to the big adventure that is middle school. Personally, I prefer the old-fashioned way of schooling, in which elementary school went through 6th grade. But life does move a little faster now than it did forty years ago, and the need-for-speed culture impacts all aspects of our lives.

He will be recognized as the most-improved kid in his class. He has come a long way, thanks to a great teacher, specialized instruction as needed and two parents who have realized that three heads are better than one when it comes to keeping track of (and doing) homework assignments.

As spring turns into summer

It is a quiet rainy morning. My son is still sleeping soundly and the dogs and cats are napping in their respective corners. Even the puppy is quiet. Yes, yet another four-legged critter has joined our collection. A black lab puppy that my wife and son found sitting on the side of the road on their drive home several weeks ago. Subsequent events have followed a predictable sequence: my wife saying “don’t worry, we’ll find a home for the puppy” and my son saying “I’ll get up every morning and take him for a walk”. My wife has made no efforts at finding a home for the puppy and I find myself constantly untangling four leashes during their morning constitutional. He is a good puppy, particularly when he is sleeping. But I am not happy with the added cost in terms of time, effort and money.

My son and I have this week to ourselves, as my wife is spending a week looking after her mom, who needs looking after while my wife’s middle sister and her partner/wife are on vacation. So far so good. He spent most of Saturday and Sunday hanging out with a new friend. My son has long bemoaned the fact that we don’t live in a typical city neighborhood with lots of other kids. But his new friend spends alternate weekends (and alternate weeks during the summer) at his dad’s house just up the road from us. It appears that his friend, who is a year older and quite mature for a sixth grader, has many of the same interests as my son. It promises to be an interesting summer.

I took advantage of the free time on Saturday to make headway on several long-delayed gardening tasks, with some success. On Sunday, I took them to the local air show and had a pleasant cookout at their house. Baseball practice was on today’s schedule, but the rain has scratched that. Instead, he’ll catch up on his sleep, play several hours of Wii, watch some baseball and maybe go with me on a trail bike ride if the rain lets up later today. I’ll get more gardening in, do some housework and make some headway at cleaning out the clutter on my desktop that has accumulated from the past few weeks. It has been a very busy semester, and summer promises more of the same. So I welcome this brief opportunity to catch my breath as spring turns into summer.

Time for a little change

So? Whadda think?

I had a little fun making an avatar today and decided to put it on my blog instead of my mug shot. Having my picture on the blog did make me think twice about revealing particular aspects of my life. Now maybe, just maybe, the thoughts will flow more easily.

Don't hold your breath...